My Beautiful Weekend

This weekend has been amazing on so many levels. I woke up yesterday morning to what I thought was my alarm clock, but it was my phone. Scott Eric Dent was calling to wake me up and tell me that he was in town. I was so excited! I got to spend time with him and some of his youth group. It always makes me happy when I get to see him because he has been such a big part of my life. I was sad that Amanda wasn't there though, but being about to bust with Riley (the new addition to the Dent clan) she wasn't up for the travel. I can't believe that he is going to have two children...CRAZY!!!

Besides that I got to see my best friend in the entire world! She came in and so we went to dinner and then she went with me to the homecoming game. Then she got to meet Dan, Justin and Rebekah. This made my whole life seem very exciting. It's almost as if two worlds became one last night and it was great!

Today was so AMAZING! I spent pretty much the entire day with Rebekah and we went shopping and she was patient with me. Even when I got tired and cranky she still put up with me. I love that girl. If she reads this then she should know that she's amazing...not me...LOL And boy does that girl know more than she wants to. I love her!

Tonight was crazy wild. It is probably a good thing that I was homeschooled...LOL Those kids were going at it. I think it made me want to have a boyfriend even more, for so many reasons, but mostly because I want someone to make out with...LOL

I love those kids...they were so awesome! Each and everyone of them looked like they were having fun, minus the drama of course...

Well it is almost 1 am and I am about about wiped...

Until later
Jess

To End a Day in Tears

Oh goodness...today I was so stressed out! This morning something that I guess I never really imagined happened in my class room...I can't even tell you what actually happened...all I know is that when it was all said and done I had two students who were on the ground throwing punches at each other...I thought that I was going to cry! In fact I think I almost did! Actually I did...just not in class...I waited until I was on my way home...

Boy was that an experience...at least now I know what that's like. Someone asked me if I got in there and split it up...and I said they were crazy! It happened and the rest of my day wasn't exacly the best but it was better than the beginning...of course then I got home and thought that I was going to die because I wasn't done with my homework and so I did as much as I could but I couldn't get it done and so I was in tears on the way to class...and then I get there...and we didn't even have homework due for the night...GRRRR!!!

Anyways...something I realized today...I love my life...and I love my friends...truly I can't imagine what my life would be like without you guys...You make my life worth living...I mean God is the reason I'm here...but you are definately the reason God put me here...You are each amazing and I thank you for being a part of my life!

Love ya!

Quotes on Love

Here are some quotes that make me smile...and some that make me want to cry...

We are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love. ~Unknown

Love is being stupid together. ~Paul Valery quotes

'You'll get over it...' It's the clichés that cause the trouble. To lose someone you love is to alter your life for ever. You don't get over it because 'it' is the person you loved. The pain stops, there are new people, but the gap never closes. How could it? The particularness of someone who mattered enough to grieve over is not erased by anyone but death. This hole in my heart is in the shape of you and no one else can fit. Why would I want them to? ~Unknown

It is a curious thought, but it is only when you see people looking ridiculous that you realize just how much you love them. ~Agatha Christie

May the love hidden deep inside your heart find the love waiting in your dreams. May the laughter that you find in your tomorrow wipe away the pain you find in your yesterdays. ~Unknown

Love is when you shed a tear and still want him, it's when he ignores you and you still love him, it's when he loves another girl but you still smile and say I'm happy for you, when all you really do is cry. ~Unknown

Love that we can not have is the one that lasts the longest, hurts the deepest and feels the strongest... ~Unknown

The minute I heard my first love story I started looking for you, not knowing how blind that was. Lovers don't finally meet somewhere. They're in each other all along.
~Jalal ad-Din Rumi

Love is like a friendship caught on fire. In the beginning a flame, very pretty, often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. As love grows older, our hearts mature and our love becomes as coals, deep-burning and unquenchable. ~Bruce Lee

I try to talk to you, but I don't know what to say. I am afraid you don't want me to say anything. So I don't. But inside of me there are words waiting to come out.And tell you how I feel-like how I miss you. And how I love you despite my broken heart.And how I need you in my life. And especially how much I want you.But those words may forver stay in my heart-locked inside.Sometimes I wonder if there are words locked inside you too... but I'll never know. ~Unknown

My Day...and Other Stuff

So today hasn't been the best day ever...I mean it wasn't horrible on the scale of fabulous to sucks...but it wasn't the greatest. I mean, I love my job, but today was one of those days where I had to remind myself that I love what I do and I wouldn't trade it for the world. Have you ever just had a day where one thing puts a kink in all that you do...well that's what happened to me this morning...I was going about my business...ready to start class...the students won't stop talking and write their journals and then I start with a lesson on comma splices...and BAM I have this kid who asks why we are doing this...I couldn't be like...because your papers sucked and we need to fix these problems...who cares whether or not they were the rough drafts (because that is the excuse that I got)...the chance that you will make the same mistake on your final paper as you did in your rough draft is pretty good...GRRRR!!!

Not that the rest of my day was bad...it's just that I let that one thing bother me...it still is bothering me...I just need to get over it and let it go...I want my students to want to learn...but I know that that is asking a lot...I love my students...all of them...even the ones that give me a headache...I love my job...what I do is my life...I know that God put me in this place for a reason...and someday maybe these kids will look back and think...wow...Ms. B really cared a lot about us...

I am tired and really need to grade papers, but I am procrastinating because I really want to go to bed early and wake up on time...

Besides all of that my life is pretty much the same...I am trying not to think of wanting to be in a relationship, because as much as I deny it...it is truly what I want...someday my prince will come...right? Who knows...maybe I will just be alone...and I need to be ok with that...I think that right now single sets well with me...I am holding out for a Wentworth Miller...Someone tall...dark...HOT...and highly intelligent...did I mention HOT? Ok guys...I love you...

Jess

Oh I Hate Tears

So...my life has been great recently...I actually love my life...feel like I am going in the right direction, feel like my life is finally as it should be...Then last night I cried so hard...I hate crying...it makes me feel as though the world has won and I have lost complete control...

How is it that I can go from feeling as though everything is as it should be to feeling so very miserable? I was praying today as I was driving and I began to think that I am being hit where it hurts the most. It's like this...all summer I've been great with the no relationship thing, I'd even felt as though I had totally given this part of my life to God...notice the past tense there...? Well I guess the last few weeks it has been on my mind and my heart and I have just let it get the better of me...I cried so hard last night...crying to God, "When is it going to be my turn?"

Now I know that I am not old...I have plenty of time left...but as Rebekah and I were talking about today...I finally feel as though I am right where I need to be in life...I don't know what else I need to do to be ready for God to give me someone...I have waited and I have been so good...why is it that I just can't find someone to love me? That's all I want...someone that loves me...who won't look at me like I am crazy even though I am...I just feel as though I am never going to find someone...and there will always be someone out there that they would rather be with...and I hate when the enemy deals such a low blow...

I just don't want it to hurt...I want to truly seek God and I know that this is only a distraction...I want to give Him my all...because I know that He has something amazing out there for me...something truly special...better than anything I have ever imagined...Just keep me in your prayers when you think about it...I know that a breakthrough is coming...IT BEGINS!!

I'm In Love (2nd Edition)

So tonight when I was in the shower I was thinking about what I wrote...While all still holds true i forgot to mention that beyond loving my life...there is also the love of my life...Jesus Christ! WOW!!! He is simply amazing...Recently I have had several people tell me that I have been on their mind...and that they have been praying about me...which is so cool by the way...

Wednesday night Mrs. Davis told me that she really felt that God wanted me to read Psalm 20...While I wasn't putting it off I just kept forgetting to do it...yesterday morning I got out my Message Bible and turned to Psalm 20...My favorite part is when it says "an answer's on the way, everything's going to work out." How amazing is that? God has answers out there for me and they are coming my way...every prayer that I have cried out to Him this year is in the process of being answered...I love how He works...

It is late and I am wired because I can't stop thinking about what God is doing in my life...He is so amazing and I take Him for granted so often. I am in the middle of a fast and I continue to think how this should be an ongoing thing...I feel more focused on Him and not so much on me...I am seeing the things I am thankful for and I am letting Him take away all my stress

I serve an amazing God...He continues to work in and through me...do not give up...do not back down from the call that God has placed on you life...He is getting ready to do NEW things...IT BEGINS!!!

I'm In Love

Today I was posting a comment on a friend's page it I told her that I am in love with my life. I can't believe how blessed I have been to have to opportunities that God has given me. I truly love everything that my life holds at the moment.

There are days when things don't go perfectly. I was sad yesterday, so sad in fact that I almost cried. I was sad because I had let my feelings get hurt over something that wasn't even a big deal, and then there's the guy issue. I truly feel as though I've gone back to my old way of thinking...the way in which all I do is think about being single and that I will never find the one...I would love to think that I have met the right guy...and I know that people say...when you know...you know...but I just want it to happen...

Who knows...let's change the subject...

IT BEGINS!!!

God is getting ready to do something big and now I can't wait to see where He is taking me...

PRAISE GOD!!!